Skip to main content

The “Perfect Perfect Birth”


The “Perfect Perfect Birth”
              Last week our home invited a couple kids over for the evening, so their parents could get a much needed break.  My daughter was enthralled with the process of planning the perfect playdate.  She said that she wanted to plan the “perfect perfect party”.  She composed a song to sing to them upon their arrival. She arranged the toys in the basement so we could have a dance party. She was telling her brothers exactly what they were supposed to do when the friends arrived.  Every detail was attended to.
              It would have been the “perfect perfect party” if it had been for another 6 year old girl who loved music and dancing.  Unfortunately, our guests were a 3 year old boy and a 1 year old girl.  Both who had interests and abilities different from my daughter.  I tried to let her know that her plans probably wouldn’t work, because it wasn’t the best fit for our guests.  There was some disappointment and frustration, but once our guests arrived that left and was replaced with the excitement of someone new to play with and care for.

              As a doula, I love the chance to help clients achieve what they consider is their “perfect perfect birth”.  Unlike my daughter though, I am aware that what might be the perfect birth for me might not be the perfect birth for my client.  It is my job to listen to their birth goals and provide them with information and support to help them achieve these goals.  In fact, the benefits of doula support are many, but having a doula doesn’t always guarantee that you will have the perfect birth either. 
              Babies have their own ideas of how they want to be born.  Care providers and birthing locations also have their own ideas of what is a perfect birth.  As doulas, we have to be flexible and know the various paths of labor and birth.  We share this knowledge with our clients so they can choose which path they can take if a detour is needed.  The creation of a birth plan and goals is helpful in getting everyone on the same page of the couples’ goals.

              Does this mean that birth never goes to plan? Not necessarily.  I will say though that the most positive birth experiences are when parents are well informed about their options along the way, and able to feel like they made the right choices for them and their baby.  As a doula, that is all I can ask for, and for me that is a “perfect perfect birth”.

 Contact Leah at Gracious Hands Doula Services today
to discuss how she can help you plan for your birthing needs.
 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

1 in 8- A message for those who wait

1 in 8
One in eight couples have made plans for a family. One in eight couples hope during a year of trying to start their family.And yet, they still wait. 1 in 8
Infertility is a real and common occurrence affecting 1 in 8 couples.  An yet we don't here about it, because those experiencing these struggles often feel isolated in their experiences.
The film One More Shot: A Film about Making Modern Families explores many of the different challenges, emotions, and approaches that are taken on the journey through infertility.
For those whom are going through this journey, this film offers a source of solidarity for those experiencing similar yet unique challenges.Even for those who aren’t the 1 in 8, the film grants a perspective that will hopefully make you more compassionate to those struggling. 1 in 4 For those who do experience pregnancy, studies reveal that anywhere from 10-25% of all clinically recognized pregnancies will end in miscarriage.
The fact is, in your circle of friends the o…
Happy August Everyone!
It has been an action packed summer in our household.I took a break from doula services to spend time with my family.This year I had Momma Camp for my older two kids, resulting in various adventures every week. One even included seeing a different type of birth at Fair Oaks Farms. School is starting again next week, and Gracious Hands Doula Services is now taking clients for fall and winter.
Here are a few upcoming events you should know!
Understanding Birth Class August 18, 2018
This class is a great starting point for expectant parents learning about all the various aspects and options of birth.The birthing process and methods used to encourage the natural progress of labor will be discussed.Birth interventions, comfort measures, and labor support are also discussed.
Class enrollment is open until August 15th. Register here.
Natural Comfort Measures Class September 15, 2018
Interactive lessons and hands on practice of comfort measures are discussed and practiced to h…

I have a dream...

On a social media page with fellow doulas, the question was asked "What would be one thing that you wish you could change about birth or postpartum in your area of the world".

Just one thing?  My immediate thought went to providing wireless monitors for all birthing facilities.  Restriction of movement during labor prevents baby's normal progression towards birth and limits comfort measures for the mother as well.

But the question got me thinking about what I really would like to see happen here in Indiana, in Tippecanoe County, Lafayette, and my neighborhood.

The Big picture?

I wish that pregnancy, birth and postpartum was something that was celebrated and supported.  I wish it wasn't treated as an illness that needs to be treated and recovered from as soon as possible.  I wish the family dynamic was respected and supported.  Paid leave allowing for time for bonding, establishment of secure breastfeeding, recovery of birth, adjustment to parenthood; all without stress o…