As a doula I am often speaking with my clients about the
importance of the Three Rs in Labor. The
terms coined by Penny Simkin refer to Relaxation, Rhythm, and Ritual
as the essences of coping in labor in place of Fear, Tension, and Pain. As our society is in the midst of the
COVID-19 pandemic, I have found myself turning to these techniques in my own life
as a way to cope during this time of uncertainty. I wanted to share these thoughts in hopes
that like with birth, we can embrace the uncertainty one day/contraction at a
time until the birth of healing arrives for our nation.
Relaxation
Uncertainty can make even the calmest person feel some stress. The key to relaxation is understanding what
is and isn’t in your control. The simplest
thing you have control over is your body and mind. Check in with yourself. Are you feeling tense in your body? Are your thoughts racing? Take time to acknowledge these feelings and
move toward a more positive place. Two
minutes of deep breathing, a long shower, or doing an enjoyable activity can
all be helpful.
Support of loved ones also helps to ease tensions. Make time to connect with these people. A good conversation, a great laugh, and even
sometimes the time to cry all offer a good oxytocin release. Be honest, loving, and kind with each
other.
Rhythm
When times are uncertain, developing a rhythm can be
comforting. Plan out some goals for the
day. Being able to look to this list throughout the day can keep you focused
and not drift into worry. Include that
time for self-care. Activities like
daily chores offer a distraction and help move the day forward. Take
time to read that book, try a new recipe, indulge in that nap, or watch that
film. For many of us, time is what we
now have of an abundance.
Ritual
Develop a routine.
Every day doesn’t have to be the same, but predictability can help in
uncertain times. Children thrive when a
routine is present. Adults in our own
way are the same. Focus on the basics
and add more as you are willing and able.
You will find the times passing faster when you know what is coming and
have a plan.
Be flexible. If one
form of relaxation isn’t working, try something different. Many options are still open to you if you
look for them. Hang in there. Tomorrow, next week, and next month will all
be different from today. Just take it
one day at a time.
Blessings,
Leah Garner
Doula, Wife, Mother, and Friend
www.gracioushandsdoula.com
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