Ask the Doula

1 in 8 One in eight couples have made plans for a family. One in eight couples hope during a year of trying to start their family.   And yet, they still wait.   1 in 8 Infertility is a real and common occurrence affecting 1 in 8 couples.  An yet we don't here about it, because those experiencing these struggles often feel isolated in their experiences. The film One More Shot: A Film about Making Modern Families explores many of the different challenges, emotions, and approaches that are taken on the journey through infertility.    For those whom are going through this journey, this film offers a source of solidarity for those experiencing similar yet unique challenges.   Even for those who aren’t the 1 in 8, the film grants a perspective that will hopefully make you more compassionate to those struggling. 1 in 4 For those who do experience pregnancy, studies reveal that anywhere from 10-25% of all clinically recognize...

Happy August Everyone! It has been an action packed summer in our household.   I took a break from doula services to spend time with my family.   This year I had Momma Camp for my older two kids, resulting in various adventures every week.  One even included seeing a different type of birth at Fair Oaks Farms.  School is starting again next week, and Gracious Hands Doula Services is now taking clients for fall and winter. Here are a few upcoming events you should know! Understanding Birth Class August 18, 2018 This class is a great starting point for expectant parents learning about all the various aspects and options of birth.   The birthing process and methods used to encourage the natural progress of labor will be discussed.   Birth interventions, comfort measures, and labor support are also discussed. Class enrollment is open until August 15th.   Register here . Natural Comfort Measures Class September 15, 2018 ...

On a social media page with fellow doulas, the question was asked "What would be one thing that you wish you could change about birth or postpartum in your area of the world". Just one thing?  My immediate thought went to providing wireless monitors for all birthing facilities.  Restriction of movement during labor prevents baby's normal progression towards birth and limits comfort measures for the mother as well. But the question got me thinking about what I really would like to see happen here in Indiana, in Tippecanoe County, Lafayette, and my neighborhood. The Big picture? I wish that pregnancy, birth and postpartum was something that was celebrated and supported.  I wish it wasn't treated as an illness that needs to be treated and recovered from as soon as possible.  I wish the family dynamic was respected and supported.  Paid leave allowing for time for bonding, establishment of secure breastfeeding, recovery of birth, adjustment to pa...

Support is more than just holding the baby Babies are cute.   There is no getting around the fact that their softness, new baby smell, soft fuzzy heads, sleepy coziness calls out to everyone around them.   It creates a desire to protect, hold, and cuddle that is definitely hard to ignore.   Just introduce a new baby to a group of adults or children and soon the requests to hold and touch the baby come forth.   Even when the baby is fussy, people are quick to offer to take baby out of mom’s arms in their offer to provide relief for mom. But, you will notice that I am not one of those people.   I won’t ask to hold your baby. When I am explaining my role as a doula, I often get one of two comments.   The first usually comes from the older generations exclaiming how they wished there were doulas available for them when they had their babies.   The other comment I get is how nice it would be to hold babies all the time.   They are...

An Insider’s Guide to Birth at… IU Arnett Hospital          In my doula career I have supported birth in a variety of facilities.   That said, I most often find myself at IU Arnett Hospital in my role of doula.   My personal experience also includes the three deliveries of my own children.   I also volunteer as a leader for the breastfeeding support group. IU Arnett is located at 5165 McCarty Lane, Lafayette, IN 47905.   The hospital is known for their birthing tubs, midwives, specialists in obstetrics, and their Riley NICU.   Checking In          When it is time to head to the hospital for delivery, especially after regular office hours, moms are directed to check in at the Emergency Department Desk.   Once checked in and paperwork signed, a nurse from the Labor and Delivery will come down and meet you and escort you upstairs.   A wheelchair will be off...

The “Perfect Perfect Birth”               Last week our home invited a couple kids over for the evening, so their parents could get a much needed break.   My daughter was enthralled with the process of planning the perfect playdate.   She said that she wanted to plan the “perfect perfect party”.   She composed a song to sing to them upon their arrival. She arranged the toys in the basement so we could have a dance party. She was telling her brothers exactly what they were supposed to do when the friends arrived.   Every detail was attended to.               It would have been the “perfect perfect party” if it had been for another 6 year old girl who loved music and dancing.   Unfortunately, our guests were a 3 year old boy and a 1 year old girl.   Both who had interests and abilities different from my daughter.   I ...

One moment at a time…. Moving through life, birth, and motherhood in its own time As a mother of three, I often find myself standing in front of a laundry basket full of clean clothing waiting to be folded and put away into their appropriate homes around the house.   Folding is not one of my favorite chores, and I am happy when my husband shares the load with me.   But, as I am often the one home during the day, the task often falls to me.   The folding in itself isn’t hard.   It is the thoughts of everything else that needs to be done that leads to my aggravation.   The other day while folding a basket of underwear (aka matching sock roulette) my mind was busy calculating what else I could get done in the next hour.   There was dinner to prep, an assignment to finish, an email to send, a Bible study to read, dishes to put away, and much more.   I started worrying that I wouldn’t be able to get everything done in my self-imposed time frame...